Violent movies and video games and their effect on your psyche.?

Do you believe if you were a truly happy and fulfilled person that you would still gravitate towards violent movies and video games? The Christians I know think video games (especially violent ones) are complete wastes of time and the escapism they provide is totally unnecessary if you are really enjoying life and are mentally and emotionally healthy. They also choose to avoid violent and profane movies like Pulp Fiction or Saw/Hostel. I am a very unhappy atheist that has always been drawn towards dark music, movies and games, even from childhood. Do you think that filling my subconscious with this constant ugliness really affects me? This goes way back to when I used to play Dungeons and Dragons and still today, anything to do with fantasy and horror really excite me.